On the frustration of having a useless degree.
Education is incredibly important to me. Its one of those things that I might support the government fully funding, except that would mean that students would only learn what the government thought was important, and I'm not about promoting the agenda of ANY administration. Again, a post for another day.
When I was picking out colleges, I had in mind that I wanted to do something science-y. My high school anatomy class had given me my first taste of dissection, and I knew that I wanted to dissect things for the rest of my life, which led to a developing interest in autopsies (stay tuned for that post). In addition to wanting to be a scientist of some sort, I wanted to be an athlete. My desire to play softball in college ended up being one of the deciding factors in my selection.
I was recruited by a few colleges, but I only applied to three of those schools. I had hopes of playing at the highest level, DI, but I wanted to make sure that the college I chose was a good fit for me academically and athletically. UNC Wilmington was my number one choice, until I spent a weekend with the team and the coach. Chowan University was okay, except that it was tiny and far from home in the middle of nowhere. They had, like, a Taco Bell and a Wal-Mart. Not ideal.
Then there was Greensboro.
Greensboro College was the perfect fit for me. The biology program was of good quality, and the class sizes were small enough that my professors knew if I was absent (and would call or email to check on my well-being). Academically, it was the best choice for me. Athletically, it was a bit complicated. I loved the determination of the coaches, and the automatic friendships I developed with the team on my weekend visit. But because GC was a D-III school, they were unable to provide an athletic scholarship. As a private school, that made paying for my education more difficult than it would have been at UNCW. Alas, I am in debt up to my eyebrows.
During my first year I decided that I definitely wanted to do autopsies. I just didn't know HOW to get there. So I finished out my biology degree and took the MCAT.
Oh mercy, the MCAT.
That's when I knew I was going to have a hard time getting into the field I so desperately desired. I saw everyone around me getting jobs, careers even, and I became very discouraged. I hadn't had a chance for an internship during college, and therefore lacked the experience that labs like Solstas and LabCorp expected from new hires. I didn't really want to work in a lab anyway, unless it was full of corpses.
So I worked for a mummy exhibit. Then I worked at a gym. Then I got my CNA license. Then I taught middle school for a semester. Then I was laid off from the gym and started working third shift as a CNA. Then I started working for a non-profit ministry that focuses on clergy care and as a manager of a self-storage facility.
I've worn a lot of hats.
Amidst the bouncing from job to job, a friend who had a connection with the morgue at Wake Forest University Medical Center (he's a detective) put me in contact with the PA there. PA as in pathologists' assistant. As in, he does autopsies for the pathologist. I was fortunate enough to shadow the PA there for eight months, on and off, and it was truly the most amazing thing I've ever done in my life. Until you've been elbows deep in a dead guy, you'll never truly understand.
So that's how I figured out that I didn't actually want to be a doctor. In September, I started researching how to become a PA, and was met with the huge challenge of being accepted into one of the nine schools in North America that offer the program. And only eight of those are accredited. And only one of those is in North Carolina... Duke University.
I found that the deadline for applying to Duke was the end of October, and spent a month scrambling to study for the GRE, prepare my application, and gather letters of recommendation. I wasn't surprised when I was rejected, but I was still disappointed. Its hard to compete with people that already have several master's degrees. Some even had PhDs.
I haven't applied again, because I just don't feel like its the right time. But it is incredibly frustrating (and even a little depressing) to go to work knowing that I'm way over-qualified. It is more than painful realizing that I have a very expensive piece of paper that says "LOOK AT ME I'M SMART AND STUFF", but it is completely worthless to most employers.
I went to college and have nothing to show for it.
Except my Hurb. Which is pretty nice. He keeps me grounded during all the turmoil of feeling completely useless.
When I was picking out colleges, I had in mind that I wanted to do something science-y. My high school anatomy class had given me my first taste of dissection, and I knew that I wanted to dissect things for the rest of my life, which led to a developing interest in autopsies (stay tuned for that post). In addition to wanting to be a scientist of some sort, I wanted to be an athlete. My desire to play softball in college ended up being one of the deciding factors in my selection.
I was recruited by a few colleges, but I only applied to three of those schools. I had hopes of playing at the highest level, DI, but I wanted to make sure that the college I chose was a good fit for me academically and athletically. UNC Wilmington was my number one choice, until I spent a weekend with the team and the coach. Chowan University was okay, except that it was tiny and far from home in the middle of nowhere. They had, like, a Taco Bell and a Wal-Mart. Not ideal.
Then there was Greensboro.
Greensboro College was the perfect fit for me. The biology program was of good quality, and the class sizes were small enough that my professors knew if I was absent (and would call or email to check on my well-being). Academically, it was the best choice for me. Athletically, it was a bit complicated. I loved the determination of the coaches, and the automatic friendships I developed with the team on my weekend visit. But because GC was a D-III school, they were unable to provide an athletic scholarship. As a private school, that made paying for my education more difficult than it would have been at UNCW. Alas, I am in debt up to my eyebrows.
During my first year I decided that I definitely wanted to do autopsies. I just didn't know HOW to get there. So I finished out my biology degree and took the MCAT.
Oh mercy, the MCAT.
That's when I knew I was going to have a hard time getting into the field I so desperately desired. I saw everyone around me getting jobs, careers even, and I became very discouraged. I hadn't had a chance for an internship during college, and therefore lacked the experience that labs like Solstas and LabCorp expected from new hires. I didn't really want to work in a lab anyway, unless it was full of corpses.
So I worked for a mummy exhibit. Then I worked at a gym. Then I got my CNA license. Then I taught middle school for a semester. Then I was laid off from the gym and started working third shift as a CNA. Then I started working for a non-profit ministry that focuses on clergy care and as a manager of a self-storage facility.
I've worn a lot of hats.
Amidst the bouncing from job to job, a friend who had a connection with the morgue at Wake Forest University Medical Center (he's a detective) put me in contact with the PA there. PA as in pathologists' assistant. As in, he does autopsies for the pathologist. I was fortunate enough to shadow the PA there for eight months, on and off, and it was truly the most amazing thing I've ever done in my life. Until you've been elbows deep in a dead guy, you'll never truly understand.
So that's how I figured out that I didn't actually want to be a doctor. In September, I started researching how to become a PA, and was met with the huge challenge of being accepted into one of the nine schools in North America that offer the program. And only eight of those are accredited. And only one of those is in North Carolina... Duke University.
I found that the deadline for applying to Duke was the end of October, and spent a month scrambling to study for the GRE, prepare my application, and gather letters of recommendation. I wasn't surprised when I was rejected, but I was still disappointed. Its hard to compete with people that already have several master's degrees. Some even had PhDs.
I haven't applied again, because I just don't feel like its the right time. But it is incredibly frustrating (and even a little depressing) to go to work knowing that I'm way over-qualified. It is more than painful realizing that I have a very expensive piece of paper that says "LOOK AT ME I'M SMART AND STUFF", but it is completely worthless to most employers.
I went to college and have nothing to show for it.
Except my Hurb. Which is pretty nice. He keeps me grounded during all the turmoil of feeling completely useless.
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